Recovery Elevator | Stop Drinking, Start Recovering. | Alcohol, Addiction & Life In Sobriety

Episode 381– We are all addicted to something   Today we have Amy. She is 39, from Canada, and took her last drink on August 21, 2016   Exact Nature:  https://exactnature.com/RE 20   Highlights from Paul   Paul talks about a book he is reading called, The Urge. It's about an Indian in the Seneca Tribe named Handsome Lake. He developed a program similar to AA about 150 years before Bill W and Dr. Bob created AA.    Connection pulled people out of addiction. The Urge:  https://amzn.to/37KVS3Y   Paul describes an experience at a Sauna in the hot springs where a group of men started talking about addiction. It began with one man sharing that he had ten years without a drink and moved to Montana for a fresh start. After he burned the ships, the other men in the sauna talked about their struggle to control substances beyond alcohol and drugs. When one person opens up and shares from the heart, it gives others a safe space to do the same.    Paul reminds us:  1) It's a challenging universe to live in; 2) we are all

Episode 380– What is Sober?   Today we have Shrene. She is 46, from Arizona, and took her last drink on September 10, 2019   AF Photography Class for beginners will start in August.  Details to follow. AF Ukelele Course #2 starts in June.   Exact Nature:  https://exactnature.com/RE 20   Highlights from Paul   Paul talks about the word sober.  For this podcast, sober refers to alcohol, because alcohol is what got Paul behind the microphone to launch Recovery Elevator.   Paul suggests not getting too attached to any idea of what sober looks like.  It’s not about the substance, but the freedom you have from the substance.  Try not to judge others for their definition of sober, because it’s rarely black and white.  When you judge others, you judge yourself and create separation.  Defining sobriety can be a fool’s errand.   Sobriety is living authentically.  Sobriety is not being a slave, to a substance, behavior, or action.   Sobriety is living your life how you want to live, living with a connected head and hear

Episode 379 – Service   Today we have Aaron. He is 40, from South Carolina, and took his last drink on September 15, 2021.   Jeff was interviewed for the podcast on episodes 104 and 377, has a book out, and is now leading sober travel trips. See links below.   Finding Bishop Castle: A Road Trip to Recovery -- https://www.amazon.com/Finding-Bishop-Castle-Road-Recovery/dp/0578882612/ref=sr_1_1?crid=350FVMX9SZBRI&keywords=finding+bishop+castle+jeff+bowersox&qid=1649339640&sprefix=Finding+Bishop+%2Caps%2C213&sr=8-1#customerReviews   Afterglow Recovery -  https://ourafterglow.com   Exact Nature:  https://exactnature.com/RE 20   Highlights from Paul   Paul talks about the benefits of service and climate change in recovery. Service gets you out of your head and out of your story. Dopamine, serotonin, and oxytocin are released when we help others.   Climate change could save us as a species by forcing us to work together and develop a collective strategy. Alcoholics can help because there’s one thing

Episode 378 – Finding Grace   Today we have Susan. She is 46, from Ohio, and took her last drink on June 14, 2019.   Exact Nature:  https://exactnature.com/RE 20   Highlights from Odette   "Whatever courage got you here is going to take you far." You are brave, and you have courage. Learn to trust yourself. Define far for yourself. The unfolding of healing takes time, have patience with yourself. Odette has two sentences of a poem on her forearm: "I am the master of my fate: I am the captain of my soul." Those words are a reminder of her strength, courage, and perseverance.    Better Help:  www.betterhelp.com/elevator - 10% off your first month                                                                               [09:20]  Susan has been sober for nearly three years. She is speaking on the podcast to get out of her comfort zone and overcome some complacency in her sobriety.   Susan is married and lives in Ohio with a stepson and two dogs. She works for an investment company and loves the outdoors, the

Episode 377 – Your favorites   Today we have Jeff. He is 47, from the Dominican Republic, and took his last drink on December 4, 2016.   Bozeman Retreat:  https://www.recoveryelevator.com/bozeman/   Exact Nature:  https://exactnature.com/RE 20   Highlights from Paul   Listeners provided highlights of some of their favorite episodes of the Recovery Elevator podcast.   330 – Learn to love yourself as your dog (or cat) loves you. You have a certain amount of energy and days in your life, and it is your choice on what to spend it on.   207 and 220 – Tom Topp inspired a listener to see social anxiety as a similarity. Another listener helped her learn that the body does heal from elevated liver enzymes without alcohol.   Another listener couldn't name one episode but instead said, sharing your story and recovering out loud helps shred the shame of addiction. It made me realize that I'm not alone, and together we can fight and overcome this!   370 Stephanie – a listener, learned to put the same energy into her recov

Episode 376 – You can be right, or you can have peace – Part 2   Today we have Ronda. She is 56, from New Orleans, and sober for 2.5 years.   Exact Nature:  https://exactnature.com/RE 20   Highlights from Paul   We are all human, with faulty machines in the dome. It's okay to be right or want to be right, especially in the moment. Sobriety teaches us that we must choose peace. We don't have to choose peace immediately, but eventually, we must, or we develop resentments. Resentments, for many of us, can kill us. Why?   Resentments separate us. Disconnect us. And what's the opposite of addiction—connection.   Better Help:  www.betterhelp.com/elevator - 10% off your first month                                                                               [10:23]  Ronda and Odette discussed the sobriety journey and celebrating the decision to quit vs. the date of your last drink. Ronda is from New Orleans and recently moved to Colorado. She has three grown children, and she is an anesthesiologist. She loves sail

Episode 375 – Decoupling   Today we have Amanda. She is 40, from Florida, and took her last drink on March 25, 2019.   The Bozeman Retreat has openings for men:  https://www.recoveryelevator.com/bozeman/   Exact Nature:  https://exactnature.com/RE 20   Highlights from Paul   Paul discusses anxiety and decoupling. Paul’s tipping point was in 2017 when his anxiety or hangxiety was so bad that he thought he was having a heart attack. As he sobered up, the anxiety temporarily worsened, then improved dramatically. 85-90% of Paul’s anxiety is gone today. Anxiety no longer controls him.   Decoupling is untangling the thoughts, actions, and behaviors no longer serving you. Decoupling is a muscle. Start small and watch the momentum build.    You are the Placebo:  https://amzn.to/3M3ChKJ     Better Help:  www.betterhelp.com/elevator - 10% off your first month                                                                               [10:20]  Amanda is married to a military husband and has two children. She works as

Episode 374 – Then go back again   Today we have Meegan. She is 37, from Georgia, and took her last drink on April 21, 2019.   Exact Nature:  https://exactnature.com/RE 20   Highlights from Paul   Addiction has the propensity to crack you open. We fight and dig our heels in, but eventually, the Addiction wins. This doesn’t mean you are destined to drink forever, but the Addiction cracks you open. Paul encourages listeners to use their energy to find what recovery method works for them. When you find it, go back again to the beginning. You will find that the messages you heard early in recovery have different lessons for you later in recovery. Go back again. Listen to those podcasts again, read the quit lit again or recovery books again, and do the steps again. You are a different person with a new set of skills,  experiences, and tools.    Revisiting those messages often provides a new value bomb.    Better Help:  www.betterhelp.com/elevator - 10% off your first month                                         

Episode 373– Control and Connection   Today we have Chris. She is 46, from Baltimore, and took her last drink on August 28, 2016.   Exact Nature:  https://exactnature.com/RE 20   Highlights from Paul   Paul thanks all the guests who have shared their stories to help us on the path toward sobriety. Paul wants to hear about your favorite episode or the value bombs that resonated with you. Please include the episode number if possible. Contact Paul at: [email protected].   Support this AF bar - https://volsteadzeroproof.com/   How are you reconciling the elements of control in your life? Paul talks about our struggles with control at the macro and micro levels. Is the opposite of control connection? We have never been more disconnected.   Paul’s homework for listeners is to invite a friend out to coffee instead of placing your mental energies on trying to control things. Go on a walk with your dog in Nature. Learn to play the ukulele with us, go on a meditation retreat, join Café RE, call your mom, volun

Episode 372– The three stages of healing   Today we have Sherrie. She is 58, from Oregon, and she took her last drink on January 21, 2019.   Highlights from Paul   Paul explains the stages of healing have less to do with how much time you were drinking and more to do with how you view your problems.  “The Energy Codes”: https://amzn.to/3I9MgMh   The three stages of healing are: Victimhood – you are playing the victim card Self Help – you identify the problem, then solve it Creatorship – there was never a problem; drinking was there to help me. You take responsibility for everything in your life.   Better Help:  www.betterhelp.com/elevator - 10% off your first month                                                                               [13:52] Sherrie lives in Oregon, has two children and three grandchildren. She loves hiking, kayaking, house projects, and her dog.   Sherrie lived overseas during her childhood. She started working at 16 and drank because older workers never asked about her age. Drink

Episode 371– Define your sobriety   Today we have Cyndi. She is 52, from California, and she took her last drink on  July 1, 2021.   Registration for the Bozeman retreat opens April 1. https://recoveryelevator.com/bozeman   Highlights from Paul   Recovery is recovering the person you were meant to be or is the most authentic version of yourself. This isn’t a practice you want to end. It’s not a checkbox or to-do list item. Besides, if you stick with it, you will start enjoying this work.   What is success in recovery? Paul says YOU should define success for the most essential endeavor of your life. Know your why and write it down. Loving yourself and being okay with yourself should top the list.   Kala Ukelele: www.kalabrand.com/elevator - 15% off your first ukelele Better Help:  www.betterhelp.com/elevator - 10% off your first month                                                                               [11:12] Cyndi is married loves hiking, puzzles, and pets.   Alcohol entered Cyndi’s life when she w

Episode 370– Phases of Recovery   Today we have Stephanie. She is from Pennsylvania, and she took her last drink on  January 2, 2020.   Ditch the Booze:  https://recoveryelevator.com/cafére   Promo Code:  OPPORTUNITY   Finding your better you with Odette   After ten years of being in recovery, Odette discovers that she never asked herself what recovery means to her. Success means different things to different people. When Odette decided to add alcohol to her recovery journey, she enjoyed counting days and celebrating milestones. Fear is a common theme Odette noticed among her sober soulmates,  fear of failure.    Relapse has been part of Odette’s journey, and she spoke about how common relapse is for those in recovery. As she searched for the reasons she relapsed, she discovered depression, perfectionism, and shame patterns. Shame dissolves hope, and without hope, you stop showing up. Sobriety for Odette is about walking toward herself and her truth.   Odette encourages listeners to define sobriety and recove

Episode 369– You can be right, or you can have peace   Today we have Katherine. She is from Colorado and took her last drink on September 24, 2021.   Ditch the Booze:  https://recoveryelevator.com/cafére   Promo Code:  OPPORTUNITY   Kala Brand Ukelele:  www.kalabrand.com/elevator   Highlights from Paul   Paul speaks to the rise of post-pandemic alcohol-free bars. Check out: https://www.wweek.com/bars/2022/02/17/portland-is-getting-its-first-zero-proof-bar-courtesy-of-no-booze-cocktail-kit-vendor-suckerpunch/   Paul speaks to brain fog and how much it impacts those of us with a history of drinking problems. Fortunately, Paul has experienced continued improvement in his cognitive function since ditching the Booze. Paul also credits meditation with improving his critical thinking and problem-solving skills. There is ample scientific evidence that meditation can rewire your thinking.   Paul also credits plant-based medicine, playing music, and being less reactive with helping his brain fog and mental cognition. P

Episode 368 – The Mind F&ck of Alcohol   Today we have Stephen. He is from New Jersey and took his last drink on September 15, 2020.   Ditch the Booze:  https://recoveryelevator.com/cafére   Promo Code:  OPPORTUNITY   Highlights from Paul   Paul shares an email from a listener who asks Paul how people without a drinking problem can get help. He talks about the A&E show “Intervention” and how he often watched it while drinking alone, grateful he didn’t have a problem with alcohol. The show, Intervention gave Paul countless examples of how alcohol “f&cks” with your mind.   After 276 interventions on the show, 270 accepted treatment, with 151 remaining clean and sober today, which is a 55% success rate. If those numbers are accurate, they are much more optimistic than the broadly accepted low teen success rate you hear from the industry.   Paul reminds listeners that you probably have a drinking problem if you are listening to a sobriety podcast. The point of addiction is to get to know yourself and

Episode 367 – Why geographical cures won’t work.   Today we have Aaron. He is from San Antonio and took his last drink on May 22, 2019.   Ukulele:  https://kalabrand.com/elevator   Highlights from Paul   Paul advises listeners that if you aren’t doing the inner work, your problems will follow you, whether you move, change jobs, or change relationships. That’s why geographic cures don’t work. He speaks about some of his geographic solutions and why they helped temporarily, but eventually, he discovered he was the problem and had to buckle down to do the deep inner work. Paul highly recommends getting out of toxic situations.    Paul describes the inner work as connecting with yourself, learning to love yourself, setting boundaries, making decisions that benefit your sobriety, and standing up for yourself. Ultimately, inner work often causes you to leave toxic situations, relationships, jobs, etc.   When you learn to respect yourself, you will choose environments that are conducive to your wholeness.    Better

Episode 366 – Walking each other home   Today we have Hailey. She is 29, from Portland, OR, and took her last drink on September 3, 2019.   Connect with Cafe RE   Highlights from Paul   Focus on the similarities, not the differences – if you believe you are unique, your inner voice can sabotage your efforts. Create a plan or strategy that will help you in those challenging moments when you want to drink. Have it with you and use it. Be mindful of the inner voice that can cause you to self-implode. Awareness helps you override negative inner thoughts. Walk each other home – listen to others, help others, and shine the light on a new way of living. As you heal, you will help others heal as well. Say thanks to those that walk you home. When you find love, enjoy life.   Better Help:  www.betterhelp.com/elevator                                                                               [11:35] Hailey has been sober for 2 ½ years and describes sobriety as different in the third year.   She has been in the res

Episode 365 – So Who Do I Connect With?   Today we have Joshua. He is 36 years old and from North Carolina. His last drink was on October 31, 2020.   https://kalabrand.com/   Highlights from Paul:   Happy Valentine’s Day! The opposite of addiction is connection. Paul shares that reality is a mirror reflecting your inner world. The most important connection we have is the connection we have with ourselves. If we don’t love, treat ourselves with respect or stand up for ourselves, that will appear in our outer world. Connecting with yourself allows you to become your own healer. Once your inner connection/relationship is healthy, that will be reflected in your external connections.   Paul recommends splitting your internal and external actions 50/50. Connect with yourself first (via meditation, journaling, yoga, etc.), then connect externally (Café RE chat, Marco Polo chat, a family member).   Johan Hari’s Ted Talk https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PY9DcIMGxMs   BetterHelp: www.betterhelp.com/elevator   [10:45] Od

Episode 364 – Booze Cruise   Today we have Ben. He is 41 from England and took his last drink on September 26, 2021.   Exact Nature exactnature.com Code:  RE20   Highlights from Paul   Paul shares some highlights from Recovery Elevator’s recent trip to Costa Rica. The group wound up on a booze cruise, remained sober, and had more fun dancing, swimming, and connecting than others who were drinking. The group trusted Paul and had a blast.   Anxiety and depression often happen when we feel disconnected. Paul described driving through Montana in a location where people waived to one another on the road. That simple gesture was a form of mini-connection; it feels good and elevates dopamine levels in a healthy way. When you perform an act of kindness, it always provokes another. Paul suggests waiving at someone at a stoplight and reminds us that the opposite of addiction is connection.    Better Help:  www.betterhelp.com/elevator                                                                               [11:29]

Episode 363 – The most powerful pharmacy in the world   Today we have Brian. He is 48 years old and from Ohio. His last drink was on March 31, 2019.   For more information about our Denver event, please go here.   Exact Nature www.exactnature.com Code: RE20   Highlights from Paul: How do you leverage the brain to work in your favor?   Acknowledge there is a problem.  Make sure your mental energies match your goal. Use the thinking mind to pull up a good memory (vacation, significant accomplishment). The cycle: The more the nervous system is in check, the more you want to do things that bring you joy. The more you do something that brings you joy, the more your nervous system calms down.   Listen to the nature sounds playlist. We forget that we come from nature; we evolved with crickets and blue jays. All you need to do is listen to nature sounds and allow them to calm the nervous system.   BetterHelp: www.betterhelp.com/elevator   [11:19] Odette introduces Brian   Brian has been sober for 1000 days.  He is f

Today we have Noelle. She is 31 years old and from Colorado. Her last drink was on June 24, 2019.   Highlights from Odette   Odette is working on Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) with her therapist. ACT encourages people to embrace their thoughts and feelings rather than fighting or feeling guilty for them.   Odette is learning not to shove her feelings away but to accept them and learn not to fuse them. Embracing negative thoughts can propel you into the right thoughts and behaviors.    If I let this thought guide what I can do, will it help me create the life I want? Use the thought if it helps; diffuse it if it's not helpful.    betterhelp.com/elevator   [8:54] Kris introduces Noelle     Noelle has been sober for 2.5 years – over 900 days!   She is an engineer and works with her brother. She has a Doberman and loves hiking, skiing, and getting outside to enjoy Colorado.   Noelle had a fake ID at 17 and always thought about how to get alcohol easier. She got into college because of her basketball ski